I'm not drunk... I promise

It's a Sunday as I write this. The first day of a long week that will hopefully end with a finished kitchen... Of course I had to include the kitchen. It's Day 2

Usually Sunday means church and today I was on kids duty. In between all the chit chat I said something about how much I love being with my kids and I found it fun. To which someone responded 

'are you drunk' or maybe it was 'what are you drinking' 

Now I will be the first to admit that there are days (and they are NOT few and far between) where a glass bottle of wine feels like it would take the edge off. I will also admit that there are days when a few edges need to be taken off for the safety of the general population within my immediate vicinity.

But most days I love being with my children. I love watching them grow and learn. I think they're incredibly extraordinary. 

And they make me laugh. 

But I often wonder about the effect it will have on our kids to hear their parents declare so strongly that they don't love spending time with them. I want both my children to know from now that I love the time I spend with them. That it makes me happy and it fills me with joy. 

I won't have ever claim to be a perfect parent. I fail. I know I do and so I sought some help from a mother wiser than I. I explained my failings in great detail and then asked her what I could do to be a better mom. And the reply I got was 

Stop being so hard on yourself and just enjoy her. 


Sounds so simple doesn't it? Just sit down. Just laugh. Just listen to the laughter. Stop trying so hard.

It's not easy though. It's hard to laugh when your children are doing hadeda calls to each down the passage at the mall. Especially when you can feel the hard unforgiving eyes boring into you. 

Except that it is that easy because really as if  that person never out a foot out of line. Children are best enjoyed as children and that time is so short and fleeting. 

So no I'm not drunk and I'm drinking anything. I'm having the time of my life.